Fearless
by For Absolution
Summary: AU starting from the Eleventh Hour. Rory wants control. The Doctor shows him it's okay to lose it. Features an eating-disordered Rory, Amy as the loyal best friend and the Doctor as a smitten lover. 11/Rory. WIP.
1. Chapter 1

AN: This is AU, folks. Rory and Amy are just best friends, and since Rory's never hit that, River Song doesn't exist. Pairing's gonna be 11/Rory, and has EatingDisordered!Rory-angst galore. Takes place right after the Doctor leaves after dealing with the Atraxi in the Eleventh Hour. And with that said, enjoy the show!

Warnings: profanity, eating disorder-imagery

'_thoughts'_- 'cause I don't wanna write 'he thought' all the time.

Chapter 1.

Scratch. Scratch. His fingernails scratched against the back of his throat as they sought out his gag reflex, moving with a skill that requires years of practice to obtain. They scratch and scratch until, finally –just there!- he pulls them out and the food and the bile and shame all fall from his chapped lips and into the porcelain bowl below. Again and again his fingers move faster than his mind can comprehend until his stomach is empty and small rivulets of blood run from his knuckle. He looks at the spilled contents of his stomach and lets out a long-drawn sigh.

_'Is this really what I've been reduced to?' _

As he leans back against the bathroom wall, he thinks. He thinks about Amy, and about playing raggedy Doctor with her- him in an oversized t-shirt and too-long trousers, her in her nightshirt and both of them pretending to chase the stars. And he thinks about how the t-shirt started getting tighter and tighter as his body expanded, bubbling with fat and growing, growing until finally the self-loathing and the taunts and the hate get to be too much; because while Amy saves him from the bullies the damage has already been done. So he starts to stick his fingers down his throat, again and again until now—and when he realizes that, yes, this is what he's been reduced to, he tucks his head in his knees and cries.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2.

Rory plopped down on the bed, his slight frame barely moving the mattress as he settled down. Amy sat down beside him and bent over forwards, digging underneath the bed until she pulled out a beaten green photo album out. Blowing off the slight dust that had collected, she started flipping through the laminated pages. Rory leaned over her shoulder, then sat back with a huff.

"Not that damn thing again, Amy! You know I hate looking through that!" He said irritably, a small scowl marring his features.

"But I love looking through this!" She exclaimed happily. "And look, here's one of us playing 'raggedy Doctor', and here's one of us down at the pond, and here's one of us in the garden, a couple years ago!" Laughing, she pointed out the pictures on the aging pages, slowly moving her fingertips over the plastic.

Rory rolled his eyes. "I hate it when you make me look at those things. You know I hate it. I look so awful in those pictures." He reached behind her and swiftly slipped the book out from under her hands as she gave an undignified squawk.

"Hey, I didn't say you could take that!"

"And you didn't say I couldn't, either."

He bent over and placed the album back under the bedframe, not noticing Amy's alarmed look.

"Rory… I can see your spine!" She said, worry evident in her tone. She reached over to touch his back when he flinched away; she gave him a hurt look.

"It's nothing, I've just been really stressed out and I've lost a bit of w-weight, is all." The small stutter in his excuse only served to worry Amy more as he stumbled through his words. "It's fine, it's not that much, anyway. It's not like I'm that skinny." '_Oh, Jesus, did that really just come out of my mouth?'_

She looked at him in abject horror. "Rory, I can see your fucking spine! Don't try to pull that over on me! You're sick! You have to be! Nobody loses that much weight and just doesn't notice it." She bit her lip and scooted closer to him. "Look, please tell me you'll, I dunno, see a doctor, or something—"

She was cut off by a loud whirring noise from the garden, and both she and Rory looked outside in surprise. They jumped up and rushed to the window, watching in awe as a large blue police box materialized seemingly out of thin air. Amy taking the lead, they ran out of her room and down the stairs, bursting out of the door and running into the tall grass. The Doctor stepped out of the TARDIS, looking none the worse for wear as he jauntily strolled over towards the pair.

"Sorry about running off earlier! Brand new TARDIS, bit exciting! Just had a quick hop to the moon and back to run her in… What's wrong? Something on my face? Oh, no, and it's brand new, too!" He blathered, trailing off when he saw the surprise on their faces.

"It's you… You came back. Again."

"'Course I came back, I always come back! Something wrong with that?"

"And you're still wearing the same clothes… Including the bow-tie."

"Yeah, it's cool. Bowties are cool."

"Seriously, are you from a different planet?"

"Uh, yeah. Anyway, whaddya think?"

"Huh?"

"Other planets, wanna check 'em out?"

_'Wow, this is awkward. Totally awkward. Maybe I should go. At least Amy'll have fun with the Doctor. I should… Really, really not be here right now."_

"You asked me that once. And now, you leave again for two years, and you expect me to just jump?" She exclaimed, stomping her foot on the ground.

"Well, I—"

"Amy," Rory interrupted, touching the irate girl's shoulder lightly. "You should go. This is what you've been waiting for, for years, remember? Don't let your anger get the best of you."

The Doctor looked Rory up and down and paused before continuing. "And, we won't have to go alone, of course. This young man can come as well! That is, if you both want—" He was cut off again.

Amy looked to Rory, who shrugged nonchalantly, trying to hide his excitement. "Yes! I mean, uh, yes. That would be nice." She said, trying to play it cool.

"Well then…" The Doctor said, giving a manic grin. "Where would you like to go?"

"Well, where can we go?" Rory asked.

"Wherever you like." The Doctor's grin got impossibly large, and he snapped his fingers. The snap threw open the TARDIS doors with a large thud, and he stood to the side of the threshold, inviting them in with an arm thrown haphazardly inside.

Amy and Rory slowly walked into the TARDIS, eyes wide as they gazed around the machine and the Doctor bounced excitedly on the balls of his feet. Silence reverberated around the console room, their footsteps being the only noise until Rory broke the silence.

"…It's bigger on the inside!"


End file.
